The machine that answered back

It is the sharpest ordinary object on this site, because it is a device that received an emotional appeal and returned a light. Nobody speaks to an answering machine believing it understands. Millions speak to one anyway, and the moment of checking whether it picked up is a small, repeated, completely irrational hope - which is what the object shelf is for. The attachment is to a thing that cannot disappoint, because it cannot act, and that is exactly why the attachment costs nothing to maintain and cannot be renegotiated.